Ephesians 6:1-3

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Now to you, children, obey your parents in the Lord because this is right in God’s eyes. 2 This is the first commandment onto which He added a promise: “Honor your father and your mother, and 3 if you do, you will live long and well in this land.” (Ephesians 6:1-3)

The Apostle opens Ephesians 6 by addressing the children of the family. He writes, "Children, obey your parents in the Lord." Note the phrase, "in the Lord." Children are to obey, because this is what the Lord Jesus wants.

The Greek word used for "obey" literally means "to be under another's authority." Most children in America scoff at this command not knowing that it is to their advantage to be defined by the Lord in this matter. This practice provides for children the internal infrastructure that will later in life enable them to live under the authority of those whom God will place in their lives.

Now, in v.2-3, the apostle moves on to press deeper into this subject. He says the same thing again, but he goes on to say that the attitude of obedience is very important. We all know, that it is possible to obey with a hardened heart. This kind of obedience is dishonoring because it depersonalizes the parent. It treats the parent as a thing, an obstacle, certainly not as a person from whom life has come, and also love and concern and care. It is to ignore every generous gift of parental love and to treat them as though they were nothing but an obstacle in the way. 

This fifth of the Ten Commandments is the first that comes with a promise. "Honor your father and mother." (Exodus 20:12). The promise that was linked to it was this: "... that you will live long and well in the land the Eternal your God has promised to give you.,"( Exodus 20:12). 

The word of God was given to us that we might know Him and His ways. His ways or culture provides the best life we can have living in this fallen world. His culture does not rescue us from the presence of sin, but it has rescued us from the penalty and power of sin. We do not have to obey sin. That is not to say that we will ever be sinless while on this earth, but we can transcend above the darkness of sin because we have seen His light.

Through modern medicine, we have discovered that a bitter and resentful heart causes all kinds of serious physical distresses. This is why the Word of God promises that honor of father and mother means a lengthening of life. We are at our best when we honor our father and mother from the heart, because we are not harboring any bitterness in our hearts. It is this bitterness and other expressions of the flesh that robs us of the quality of life that God wants to give us while living in this fallen world.

This is not to say that God has promised us good health and much wealth while we are on this earth. This may be, but God has been known to use bad health and poverty to bless us with far more than the blessings of this world. I speak of the blessings of the world to come. Jesus said, “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys, and where thieves do not break in or steal ...” 

Finally, this is NOT to say that we are earning now that which we will get in heaven. The Lord Jesus wants us to be free from anxiety, seeking His kingdom, laying up treasure in heaven and not on earth. This is the fruit of trusting Him as our Lord and Savior and Treasure. This is the normal Christian life, radical freedom from earthly things and earthly security, with a joyful pursuit of God and His righteousness as our treasure. When we get to heaven, we will understand fully, and then, we will say I am glad I allowed Jesus to define me while on planet earth.


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