25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. (Ephesians 5:25-27)
The most misunderstood word is love. In fact, in the Greek language, there are four to choose from. The type of love that Paul is describing in our text for today causes a husband to lay down his life for his wife. However, our culture has strayed so far from God's definition of real love, it has no idea of its depth. We live in a world that has defined love in such a way that husbands love themselves more than do their wives and family.
Paul writes in v.25, "Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her." The Lord Jesus gave His life that the church might be holy, that He might present us to the Father in His completeness. These same goals apply to the husband and wife relationship.
The husband is to give himself up for his wife in order that he might enable her to be defined by the One who is the only complete One. The word "holy" means "put to the proper use." It is not a religious word. Anything that is put to its proper use is holy, and that is what the word means here.
The Lord Jesus gave himself up on the cross in order that those redeemed by His grace, might be put to the proper use for which God intended them. This is also to be the goal of the husband. He is to give himself up for the wife in order that she might fulfill God's call on her life. This calling is to be a helper to her husband.
According to v.26, the instrument the Lord uses to make us holy or more mature in our walk with Him is His word. Paul writes, "by the washing with water through the word." By defining things for us through His word, God makes us more useful for His purposes. The Lord Jesus said, "You shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free" (John 8:32).
A husband who is walking with the Lord and being defined by Him will have a wife who in submission to His leadership. Of course, this is dependent upon her walking with the Lord and being defined by Him. We are best defined by God when we are following what He has said on a given subject in His word.
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