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11 As for younger widows, do not put them on such a list. For when their sensual desires overcome their dedication to Christ, they want to marry. 12 Thus they bring judgment on themselves, because they have broken their first pledge. 13 Besides, they get into the habit of being idle and going about from house to house. And not only do they become idlers, but also busybodies who talk nonsense, saying things they ought not to. 14 So I counsel younger widows to marry, to have children, to manage their homes and to give the enemy no opportunity for slander. 15 Some have in fact already turned away to follow Satan. 16 If any woman who is a believer has widows in her care, she should continue to help them and not let the church be burdened with them, so that the church can help those widows who are really in need. ~ 1 Timothy 5:11-16
We have been studying 1 Timothy 5 for some time now. The subject of this section is the care of widows. In today's text, the Apostle Paul provides instructions for the young widows who would be more likely to remarry given their husbands are no longer with them.
In v.11 we read, "As for younger widows, do not put them on such a list. For when their sensual desires overcome their dedication to Christ, they want to marry."
For the woman who is younger than sixty and is widowed and she finds that she has the desire to remarry, the Apostle Paul writes, "do not put her on the list of widows" who do the afore mentioned ministry." In fact, the Apostle instructs us to encourage her to remarry, to make a lifelong commitment to the man the Lord has brought into her life, even if she had committed to serve the Lord as a single person. This is normal and there is nothing wrong for her to want to spend the rest of her days with a man that she is attracted to and whom she can care for.
In v.12-13 we read, "12 Thus they bring judgment on themselves, because they have broken their first pledge. 13 Besides, they get into the habit of being idle and going about from house to house. And not only do they become idlers, but also busybodies who talk nonsense, saying things they ought not to."
If these younger widows still had the desire to marry, Paul encourages them to marry. God puts these desires in our hearts, even if she had made a pledge to serve the Lord as a widow. The judgment in v.12 would have been from those who were aware of her "first pledge" to serve the Lord as a widow and never marry again.
In v.13, the Apostle Paul describes a woman who has the desire to get married again, yet she thinks this desire is not from God. When we do not understand God's will for our lives, it is then that we are more likely to feed the flesh. Thinking the desire is not from God, we wrestle with it more and more. Then we struggle to know what to do with the angst that has been created. And, when we find ourselves in these places, we do what is easiest and most natural: we give in to feeding the flesh. This is what Paul is describing in v.13.
Lest any of us become judgmental, we have all experienced this when we have concluded the wrong thing about the Lord's will for our lives and we are discouraged and distracted and we do not know what to do. It is at this point that we find ourselves giving up on walking with His Spirit and we resort to feeding the flesh. The flesh always has a greater chance to strengthen itself when we start operating off of an incorrect understanding of God and His will for our lives. And, think of it, her desire to be married is from God.
If it is God's will for the widow to remarry, she should not be involved in the ministry that those who are sixty and above are involved in. I have found, when I am out of God's will for my life, the flesh seems to be that much more stronger in its lure of getting me to go its way. The key here is to know God's will and do it. And, for a widow, remarrying is not sinful, but being a busybody is, especially if she is saying things which are the products of the flesh.
In v.14-15 we read, "14 So I counsel younger widows to marry, to have children, to manage their homes and to give the enemy no opportunity for slander. 15 Some have in fact already turned away to follow Satan."
The Apostle here gives some reasons for encouraging us to encourage a widow to remarry: “to have children.” This was God’s command to our first parents in Genesis 1:28. So, the normal result of marriage is a family. Raising up children who have a heart for the Lord and others is the purpose for which God has designed the home. Having and training children to love God is God’s purpose for mankind, and, even though a woman had been married, lost her husband, and needed to be remarried again, the purpose doesn’t change.
We live in a culture which rejects the idea of the wife not working and the husband being the bread winner for the family, but this is God's design. This is one of several explanations for the disintegration of the American family. And, I know it is hard, my wife and I lived off of a Christian school salary for years, but we were determined to obey the Lord's teaching. And, He blessed us and provided even though we had some very lean years there for a while. We were convinced that someone in a Day Care would not train our children quite the way we would if their momma had stayed home with them. To ignore God's design for the family is paramount to turning away to Satan's ways of thinking and living.
In v.16 we read, "If any woman who is a believer has widows in her care, she should continue to help them and not let the church be burdened with them, so that the church can help those widows who are really in need."
Paul is careful here to not discourage those who want to do this ministry to those who are widows. God has always had a heart for the helpless, the weak, the lonely, and the discouraged. This is a major reason why you and I have been included in His family, that we might have a heart for the neglected, lonely, and despairing. And, even if we are not ministering to widows today, the principle is yet for us all: Look for someone to encourage today. Lord knows we need it in our sin ravaged world!
